想不透

最终还是又受伤了
最终还是心痛了
最终还是剩下我一个孤独的守着夜晚的星空
最终还是自己一人走在漆黑的夜晚

现在的我并不知道该做什么
我什么都想不通
我什么都不能做
空荡的思想
忧郁的心情
走在黑暗的道路上不知下一盏灯是否还会出现
会再遇上你吗？
我想不透...

一次的爱情千日的约定

从一开始 就该爱着你 若早知道会变成这样
我们过往的幸福 虽然太过短暂
不 那对我而言已经足够了

不要试图去抓住 将要消失的东西
我的爱 并不只是昨天的你
今天的你 现在的你 我依然还爱着
明天的你 无论怎样的你 我也会继续爱下去
暂时将你抛下的那段时间里 我的心还是很痛
为了我再作停留好吗
我无法就这样让你走

若能一起走到最后
若只要能把我的一切都献给你

灿烂的阳光 绚丽的天空 想与你一起分享
世上的一切 美好的事物 全都只想给你
但是为了你我什么都做不了 太心痛
如今到此叫我放手就为了你

一次的爱情 千万滴眼泪 如果注定属于我
一次的爱情 如果是你 我不会后悔
请允许我 想要守护已经改变的你的这份悲伤
为了我再作停留好吗
我无法就这样让你走

思绪，想法...都无法平静啊...

遇见你之后，以为会有所不同，以为你会陪我走到最后，以为你就是我的完美结局；我的句点。没想到我还是脱离不了那魔咒，才刚开始的旅程就这样画上了分号。整夜都无法入睡，辗转难眠，翻来覆去。喝了几瓶酒后勉强小休一会儿，可是思绪还是无法平静下来。没了你的日子我得怎么过。。。怎么过。。。

It's not thinking anymore, it's love

Earlier today i'm working on site, there are plenty of delicious "fresh meat" walking around. They are so gorgeous and wealthy, and i saw them checking me out! But all i think about was you, and the urge to have you next to me all the time is getting stronger. My feelings for you has gone into another stage...A stage that I've been there last time. I am overwhelm by the feeling i have for you. My head is spinning into infinity, my heart skips beats and i have to do CPR to myself, i can hardly breath...Are you having the same feeling that i'm feeling? I don't know, at least not anymore. You are so young and beautiful, and i'm just not that young and normal. Why do you want to be with me? But this is still a question and there are no answer, yet...hopefully...

I just want to be in love with you, i don't want to wake up in the morning and you are not there with me. I want to cuddle you in the night and wake up together in the morning, i want you to be the first person that i see when i open my eyes.

Baby, i love you.

Thinking, crying, couldn't sleep...

This few days i'm really tired. Working on site for an event and arranging classes and rehearsals...but most of the time i'm thinking about him. What should i do to make the day pass-by brighter the night to pass-by easier? Every time i saw the pouch that he sew my name on it, i can hardly breathe, my heart skip one beat. Do i love him so much? I couldn't tell...Because i don't know how much is much, how much is less...i just know that when i'm not with him my heart tend to stop beating.

I keep ask myself, am i going to end up like the last relationship? I really don't know what's seems to be the problem in the relationship...can you tell me what i need to change, what you don't like me doing in this relationship, just tell me what are you thinking. If in a relationship you can't say this things, you can't demand for what you want, you can't express your feeling for him that you been dying to tell your love ones, then whats the point to be in a relationship...

Am i asking too much from him? Am i over possessive? Yes maybe i am..I admit, but we are at the beginning of a relationship,is this suppose to be happen so soon? Why you make me feel the way you treating me like those others ppl in my past? When i start this relationship with you, you make me feel like i'm important to you, i mean a lot to you. But now you make me feel like the same old me again.

Every day and night i pick up the hand-phone thinking of calling you but my fingers are not functioning well... almost every 5 to 10 minutes i'll look at the phone, hoping the next phone call will be you or even just a two words message... but all i ever feel is much more lonelier, all i see is myself in the reflection on the phone screen. I don't know what to do now...

In this time in this hour my brain tend to shut down and stop every thinking process. But my heart still skip one beat.

~crying~

Thinking of living with you and happily ever after

I'm waiting for you, right here standing...
I'm not leaving till i can see you appear at the corner of the street.
Am i too distance at first? Am i too needy now?
I admit i'm over possessive. But what do you want? I couldn't tell.
I'm not a date expert or a psychic, i don't know what i'm suppose to do next... I don't know what i'm suppose to do to make you want me more...
Can give me more clues so that i know what i should do next.

All i want is to be with you. All i need is to be there by your side. All i ever wanted is to settle down with you and start to build a future with you and me in it.

Wish we could live happily ever after.

Do i really need to think more? Am i started to doubt myself?

The past is a poison, it kills me slowly and painfully. The past is like a black spot on a white cloth, it's very obvious. Would you able to cover that? Would you able to make people not realize the spot? Would you able to let it go and move forward without looking back? Would you able to ignore those people who spotted that and make fun out of you and just smile like an idiot? I started to doubt myself and my capability.

Today i broke down, tears pouring out of my eyes uncontrollably, my heart being stabbed repeatedly, my body being punch and kick unstoppable. Would i survive this round? Or should i say will i survive this time... Well i have no choice, at all. Its not an option for me, since long time ago. I have to make it works. But how much time will it takes? How much energy i need to spend? No one knows, no one can give me the exact answer. I'm alone.